When Does Old Age Begin?

Joel Pinsker addresses the words used to describe “old age” in the Atlantic Magazine in his article “When Does Someone Become Old?”. The article reviews the many words that define those who are “aging”, such as elder, elderly, senior, retired, old, older, geriatric, and mature. In considering the topic of aging, I have always tended to use the term elderly because I am elderly. That fact is validated by my association with an eldercare professional as well as living with a disability and rapidly approach my eighth decade on this planet. Each of the words that are used to describe aging have connotations that are either disparaging or respectful. While reading this article, I began to consider aging through the lens of my relationship with aging. Am I really “elderly” (somewhat disparaging) or am I an “elder” (a respectful term that denotes experienced or wise)? Am I retired or have I transitioned to a new calling? Is “partially retired” a reasonable description to which I could attach myself?

When do we get old? I am rapidly coming to the conclusion that aging is truly up to the individual and his/her assessment of what they are experiencing. “Middle age” can extend from about 40-45 years of age to perhaps 50-60 years of age (assuming middle age covers a span of years relative to life expectancy). It’s true that I have a disabled aging body. I also have an active mental life that is constantly expanding in its understanding of the cosmos and in its understanding of life and its transitions. The mental experiences that I am encountering are providing levels of peace and happiness that I have never previously experienced. So… what term should I use to describe myself? How about “aging with grace”?

Where do you fit into the spectrum of aging? Does aging enter into the image that you see when you look at the mirror? Do you categorize yourself with age related descriptive words? I have always thought that the inevitability of aging is nothing more than part of a life cycle that touches my physical being but that does not greatly affect my mental and emotional being. This was a decision that I made in my thirties. This decision has made aging roll out in two ways for me. Aging affects my body. On the one hand, the body ages and infirmities occur. While that process is in progress, I have learned to rely on curiosity, experience, and core values that keep me tethered to world around me and to relish what the next adventure lies just over the horizon.  My outlook on the world is not defined by what I am physically experiencing.

Where is this description of my experience heading? I am encouraging each of you to develop the ability to separate your physical being from your mental being. The pathway to accomplishing this separation is merely a function of making the decision that you will continue to be curious, that you will continue to read and study the myriad treasures that the world around you provides and that you will develop the gratitude that accompanies continued mental, spiritual and emotional growth, growth that never has to end as long a we breathe.  

Safe Harbor Pathways is intended to provide encouragement as we travel the aging pathway. Join our community by following safeharborpathways.com.